


The Number One Superhero Detective Agency

by agents_cxrter



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, WandaVision (TV)
Genre: Angst, Co-workers, Denial of Feelings, F/M, Flirting, Workplace Romance, bring your superhero to work day, but just a lil bit - Freeform, card tricks, lots of flirting, smart people being dumb
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-18 11:33:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29489088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agents_cxrter/pseuds/agents_cxrter
Summary: After the events of WandaVision, Agent Jimmy Woo and Doctor Darcy Lewis set up an FBI department to deal with unusual cases. Well, department might be pushing it - so far it's just them, some computers, and a room that might have once been a stationary cupboardOR; Jimmy + Darcy + tiny office space = flirting
Relationships: Darcy Lewis & Jimmy Woo, Darcy Lewis/Jimmy Woo
Comments: 46
Kudos: 118





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t written fanfic in years, but something about Randall Park’s cutie pie face made this happen. I just want good things for Jimmy Woo, and Darcy feels like a pretty good thing. I took that one line about him potentially wanting kids in the future and decided they’re in love. 
> 
> This will most likely be random scenes and vignettes of them doing their X-Files thing without much overarching plot, although who knows if inspiration will strike. If you have any requests for things you’d like to see or other Marvel characters you want to see them interact with (Monica and Scott will probably turn up at some point ngl), leave a comment and let me know! I’m truly making this up as I go along and it’s just a bit of silly fun (unless that Jimmy Woo show does get picked up and Disney wants to hire me in which case please consider this my pitch). 
> 
> Disclaimer: I know nothing about the FBI and didn’t want to google too much in case they’re watching me. Also, this is being written before the end of Wandavision so I have no idea what happens to these guys past episode six but I really hope Darcy is okay.

Jimmy was slotting his freshly sharpened pencils into the pen cup on his pristine new desk when Darcy barrelled into their office. As usual, she was laden with a backpack half her size, cables trailing out the top where she had given up on trying to wedge all her stuff in and just pulled the zip up as far as she could. Not as usual – she seemed to be in a rush. Jimmy knew Darcy was far from unfit, but he’d also known her long enough to learn physical activity wasn’t high on her to-do list and often meant she was either running headlong from a threat or recklessly into a dangerous situation.

He flew to his feet so fast the force sent his chair scooting back noisily before tipping over completely. His reaction was purely out of concern, obviously, and a little bit of the gentlemanly manners his Korean mother had instilled in him since he could walk. His palms were only a little sweaty because of the shock he got from the door swinging into the wall with a bang. Definitely no other reason.

“Darcy!” He clutched a hand to his heart to slow the pounding, surreptitiously swiping the dampness off on his shirt. “Are you okay?”

Despite the San Francisco heat, she was still wearing a beanie; today’s was a deep crimson red, perfectly matching her ever-present lipstick. When she tugged it off her head, it made her hair fluff up. 

The beanie was tossed onto the empty desk opposite his, followed by the backpack with a heavy clunk that made Jimmy wince. Shrugging off her jacket, she dumped it on top of the pile before turning to him.

“Yes. Stop. Sit.” She instructed, flapping one hand at him while flexing the fingers of the other. She took a few steps forward till she was in front of his desk – small funding meant small offices – and waited as he awkwardly reached back for his chair. “I have something to show you. I’ve been working on it all night.”

Jimmy gawked at her. “You got a case? Why didn’t anyone tell me? It’s been a while since I pulled a research all-nighter but we got pretty late there on the Maximoff Anomaly…” 

“What? No. Nothing like that. Here.” Darcy waited impatiently as he pulled his chair upright and sank into it, eyeing her warily. “Okay.” She took a deep breath, then flicked her wrist sharply. Nothing happened. “Oh, come on.” She whined, repeating the gesture fruitlessly a few times.

“Darcy, are you-“

“Shh!” She shot him a glare that made him clamp his mouth shut obediently. “I had it before, goddamnit.” She started to furiously jerk her hand, face furrowed into a frown of concentration. “This time. Okay, this time. No really… this time! Okay, I’ve really got it now.” She shook out her wrist, rolled her neck and braced herself. “Ta-DA!”

At the last second, Jimmy realised what she was attempting and what she’d done wrong, just in time for a whole stack of business cards to burst out of her sleeve and explode over his desk and the floor.

“Sweet snickerdoodles!” He yelped, darting off his chair to get out of the way.

They both remained silent, watching as the last few cards settled before Darcy let out a huff.

“Aw, man.” Darcy didn’t quite stomp her foot, but it was close. “I really thought I’d got it that time.”

Jimmy smiled, plucking one of the scattered cards from his desk and turning it over to read ‘Darcy Lewis B.S, Ph. D, Astrophysics, FBI Consultant’. “You’ll get it. It took a superhero on house arrest, several hours of YouTube and a five-year crisis for me to figure it out.”

“I was hoping to do without that last one.” Darcy muttered. “I should be able to get a stupid card trick quicker than my doctorate.”

Jimmy started picking up the cards, slotting them together as Darcy crouched to scrabble for the ones on the floor. She dumped some onto his desk in a haphazard pile before diving for more.

“We can go over it again.” He reassured when her head popped up again. “I’m a patient teacher.”

“Ha!” Darcy ducked down again. Her voice was muffled through the wood. “And I’m a very impatient student. Ask anyone. Ask Jane; Doctor Foster? I used to drive her crazy.”

“I can imagine.” Jimmy murmured, quietly enough she wouldn’t hear. He wasn’t really sure what he meant when he said it and refocused on dislodging one of her cards from his half-filled pen cup. 

Darcy stood back up, dumping the last of the cards from the floor onto his desk and starting to shuffle them into a rough pile. He reached out to help, aiming to stack his neater bundle on top of hers, when their fingers brushed. 

Jimmy Woo prided himself on his professionalism. He’d maintained a safe distance from both Darcy and Monica during their time on the Maximoff case, never wanting either of them to feel intimidated by him (though he doubted they would anyway – an astronaut and a doctor nervous of him? Please.) or like he was ever forcing them into situations where they didn’t feel safe (never mind the fact he had willingly followed them both into danger without a second thought). It was second nature to be the perfect gentleman and almost enough for him to ignore the slight pull he felt whenever Darcy was nearby. They’d received several glares from Hayward (he didn’t like to speak ill of people, but what a dick) for whispering like school kids through meetings, but somehow, he always gravitated to her side even though his brain would remind him he should be focusing and keeping away from distractions. But Darcy was very distracting.

He snatched his hand away suddenly like he’d been stung, knocking the top few cards from the tiny mountain Darcy had created. “Uh, sorry. Clumsy fingers.” 

She quirked an eyebrow at him and smirked. “Is that why it took you five years?” 

Jimmy huffed a laugh. “Sure.” He squeezed his hand into a fist before stretching his fingers wide, trying to shake the tingling feeling leftover from touching her. Just an electric shock, obviously. “We’ve got time.” He added. “For the trick, I mean.”

“Yeah. Totally.” Darcy lifted a shoulder at him in a half shrug, scooping up her business cards and inspecting the ragged pile. “These aren’t too bent to give out, right? Eh, who cares.”

She crossed back to her desk, yanking open a random drawer and dumping the lot inside. Jimmy winced; he was hardly a neat freak, but the FBI had drilled a certain level of organisation into him. Still, that’s what made them a great team; Jimmy knew how to run an investigation inside and out, but Darcy was the wildcard. She’d seen some pretty out-there stuff long before he was dealing with shrinking superheroes and magical sitcoms, and pairing it with her scientific background led to some ingenious solutions to problems that had the FBI scratching their heads. At least, that’s what Jimmy had argued when he applied for funding for them to set up this office, the first of its kind for the bureau. 

Sure, they hadn’t actually had a case yet, but with the Avengers scattered and the world recovering from The Blip, something was bound to cross his desk soon. Monica was busy wrestling S.W.O.R.D back into shape, but he knew she had the big, cosmic stuff covered for now. But the street level stuff? An unusual weather event, a robbery that seems impossible, a kid grappling with new abilities? That was what he and Darcy were here for, with the FBI funding and brand-new office space to prove it. 

Well, the funding was small and reluctantly handed over, and the office might have been a storage closet in a previous life, but it was theirs and they were officially a government approved team. And he liked being on a team with Darcy.

“So, what’s first, boss?” Darcy lugged her giant backpack off her desk with a grunt, bending over to grab her fancy keyboard and a handful of wires from it.

“First, I’m not your boss.” Jimmy pointed out, booting up his own computer as she untangled the necessary cables and started hooking up the multiple monitors she’d insisted she needed to her hard drive. “We’re partners.”

“Correct.” She glanced over at him with a grin. “That was a test and you passed.”

Jimmy rolled his eyes good-naturedly, loading up the FBI bank of files on unusual cases. She was going to keep him on his toes, that was for sure. “Well, there doesn’t look like there’s much new. The Daily Bugle site has another ‘expose’ on Spider-man but its just the usual clickbait nonsense. More reports on people who should have come back from The Blip, but they’re being handled by the kidnappings and missing persons investigations. They should flag any that seem strange to us but I bet it’ll take some time before they’re willing to ask for help. There’s rumblings coming out of Sokovia, but their authorities aren’t sharing for now…” He frowned at his screen, clicking through a few more folders before sighing.

“So… there’s nothing?” Darcy pursed her lips at him from across the room.

“For now.” Jimmy agreed, dejectedly. He hovered over the folder he’d put together on Scott Lang and wondered if Pym Laboratories might need their help; they usually had something weird going on. “But we’ve only been set up a couple of days. I’m sure something will turn up.”

Darcy’s keyboard clicked a few times. “Actually… I’ve just had an encoded message come through.” She announced, grasping for her glasses in the front pocket of her backpack and shoving them onto her face as she squinted at the screen.

Jimmy straightened immediately, reaching for a pencil and pad of paper. “Can you decode it?”

“Yeah, hang on…” Darcy pressed a few keys, frowning. “It’s addressed to you.”

Jimmy jerked in surprise. Darcy had far more contacts in superhero world and the science community keeping an eye on unusual occurrences then he did. Maybe Lang was reaching out after all? They’d shared a couple of messages since the battle at the old Avengers compound, with Jimmy oddly emotional to know the former offender was back in one piece, looking barely a moment older than he had the day he’d unclipped the ankle tag. If Scott needed their help, he had it. Plus, he was yet to show him how he’d mastered the card trick; maybe if got Darcy up to snuff too they could both surprise him with their skills. That would be pretty badass. “To me?”

“Yeah.” Darcy confirmed. She tapped a few more times. “Okay, I’ve got it. It says… ‘Agent Woo. I have a mission for you.’” She raised her eyebrows at Jimmy; he shrugged helplessly back. “’Your task is to head downstairs to the third floor kitchen and make Darcy a coffee. Oh, and maybe get some of those chocolate biscuits too. Or a Danish, I hear they’re good. She skipped breakfast this morning and she’s hungry and you’re the only one who can help.’” She leaned back in her chair, rolling her neck to look at him. “Well. You heard them. The state of the world depends on you.”

Jimmy, having cottoned on part way through scrawling down the message, regarded her through narrowed eyes. “More like the state of your stomach.”

As if on cue, Darcy’s stomach gurgled, clearly enticed by the thought of baked goods. She grinned, unabashed. “Help me, Agent Woo, you’re my only hope.” She pulled head headphones from her backpack and plugged them into the computer, grinning at him. “Besides, I know how much you love to get coffee.”

Despite the jibe, Jimmy was already getting to his feet, shrugging on his suit jacket. “Yeah, yeah.” He scooted around his desk, reaching to pull the still open door closed behind him.

“I’ll take it with-“

“French creamer and two sugars, I know.” When Darcy didn’t quip back, he paused with the door slightly ajar to glance back at her.

“You know my coffee order?” Darcy asked him, paused in the act of raising her headphones over her ears. 

Oh. Was that weird? He’d done so many truck stop runs on the Maximoff case, plus seen her pour a staggering amount of sugar into the watery sludge they’d called coffee on the base that he’d picked it up along the way. He hadn’t remembered intentionally. He remembered Monica’s too, obviously. She had it black. Or with a splash of milk. Or was it with sweetener? No, she definitely took it black. Probably.

“I’m… very observant?” Jimmy hedged. He felt like his ears were turning pink and hoped she couldn’t see in the shadow of the doorway.

“Yeah.” Darcy’s gaze lingered on him, tongue caught between her teeth. 

“So.” Jimmy flustered for the second time this morning, scratched the back of his head. “I’ll just be going to get that then.”

“Yeah.” Darcy nodded at him as though she was giving him permission. He pulled the door behind him, pink flush running down his neck too as he set off agitatedly down the corridor. He missed the pleased little smile that turned up the corners of Darcy’s lips before she settled back into her chair and got to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look how much he loves to get coffee: https://64.media.tumblr.com/a4a0abc821a51baa7d00e4887fbce57d/c8069140787f19fa-b0/s640x960/f99fbdadc861cf2d5359e573752db79fb8361c58.gifv
> 
> If you fancy leaving a review, that would be greatly appreciated! And like I said up top, if there are any scenarios, prompts, characters you want to see, let me know.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone who has bookmarked, left kudos or commented her and on Drawing a Line! You've all made me smile during this tough time and I hope you're all doing okay.
> 
> Your reward is a lil bit of angst and Darcy wearing Jimmy's clothes - you're welcome!

When Darcy had been called to the scene of a local shopping mall with Jimmy after a sudden influx of 911 calls and reports of bright green sludge seeping down the walls, she hadn’t thought it would be the last time she would ever be able to wear her beloved grey beanie. If she had known that it would be the victim of a horrendous amount of weird alien goop seeping into the wool fibres and permanently tie-dyeing it with fluorescent patches, she would have picked a different one or maybe even gone commando upstairs, so to speak. But hindsight was 2020 and when she’d rounded a corner and seen the humanoid creature raise its hands and unleash a stream of glowing green right at her partner, she’d given Jimmy a solid shove into a Sephora and taken the brunt of it herself.

The alien had turned out to be friendly, the goo gross but harmless (Darcy was mildly disappointed to learn today would not be her radioactive superhero origin story). A sensitivity to noise had caused the creature to freak out while trying to find others of its kind who had apparently crash landed nearby, a, story verified by a S.W.O.R.D agent who arrived in the aftermath of the goo-splosion. They’d handed the alien over to the agent’s custody after confirmation via a call with Monica that they were already working to reunite it with its friends and Darcy had trudged across the road to an evacuated gym to try shower off as best as she could. Her clothes were ruined and since they’d taken Jimmy’s FBI standard SUV and not her tiny car, the only alternative was his (thankfully clean) gym gear that had been in the trunk. 

The clothes were comically too big for her; Jimmy only had four inches or so on her height wise, but the sweatpants pooled around her ankles until she rolled the hems up several times. The long sleeves of the top covered her hands entirely, excess fabric flapping about any time she moved her arms. Darcy wondered, as she rung out her wet hair and took stock of her appearance in the changing room mirror, why the FBI insisted on branding everything. It hardly seemed covert to walk across the mall parking lot with their acronym across her boobs. 

Jimmy escorted her back to the car, where another agent took the plastic bag (another Woo trunk find – it was cute that he cared about the environment and brought his own bags to the store) of her squelching clothes to take to ‘the lab’. 

These government agencies always had a ‘the lab’ and Darcy knew her beanie was never going to return from it.

They drove back to the FBI building in silence, Darcy mourning her hat while Jimmy gripped the steering wheel so hard his knuckles turned white, jaw clenched. He didn’t even complain when she put her feet on the dashboard and changed the radio station five times until it landed on the 80s station.

Once inside their little office, nestled away from the main buzz of the fifth floor, Jimmy slumped against his desk, wiping a hand down his face. Darcy mirrored his position at her own desk, directly opposite his. There really wasn’t enough space in here for their desks to fit any other way, running parallel along the length of the room with a couple of feet between them. She’d ran some experiments on the dimensions of this room; namely, could she hit Jimmy with an M&M from all four corners plus the doorway and her desk? (Conclusion: yes, but when prepared he was unexpectedly good at catching them in his mouth.)

The quiet was starting to feel a bit oppressive, so Darcy did what she did best: talk.

“Well, that was fun!” She announced cheerfully, ignoring Jimmy’s baleful glance. “I’ve never met an anxious alien before. If I shot gunk outta my hands every time I was feeling neurotic-“ She cleared her throat and cut herself off. “Well, lets just say it wouldn’t be pretty and I would have to replace a lot of scientific equipment.”

Jimmy didn’t laugh. Darcy pursed her lips together, making an obnoxious noise.

“All right, what’s up with you?” She finally huffed, hitching the waist of the sweatpants a little higher. “You’ve been Mr Grumpy Pants since we left the mall. Are you hangry? I knew we should have swiped some pretzels from that cart before we left.”

Jimmy broke his staring content with the carpet to look at her in disbelief.

“Darcy,” He chided softly. 

“What? I would have left some money! Although $8 for a pretzel is steep.” She squawked defensively. “I’m just asking what’s got your knickers in a twist.”

Jimmy sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m just… Listen. Don’t- don’t pull any shenanigans like that again, okay?”

Darcy scoffed at him, pushing up her – his - sleeves where they covered her hands. “Shenanigans? What, like jumping into the path of some alien goo? Do you think this’ll be a regular occurrence for us?”

“No.” Jimmy looked up and stared her firmly in the eye. Darcy’s smile faltered at his intensity. “I mean jumping in _front of me_ when I’m in the path of some alien goo. Or a bullet, or a laser, or _any_ kind of threat.”

Darcy blinked at him. As endearing as it was to see him concerned, this wasn’t how she envisioned their partnership when she’d agreed to his idea. “No way.” She folded her arms over her chest, returning his stare tenfold. 

Jimmy sighed. “Darcy, you don’t understand-“

“I understand perfectly!” She retorted. “I might have the Ph. D. and you might have the gun, but that doesn’t make this a ‘I’m the brains, you’re the muscle’ kind of team up. I’ve seen front row what happens when the dude who does the punching decides the poor little genius lady can’t handle herself-“

“Hey, now, I didn’t say that-“

“-and decides to go off on his own into danger. And guess what? The scientist dumps his ass because it doesn’t matter if you’re a federal agent or an Asgardian god, you try to take on the world yourself and you don’t leave space for anyone else to be there too.” She understood where he was coming from; he was the one with the bullet-proof vest, after all, but Darcy had no interest in becoming anyone’s damsel. “You think that out there was hairy? Try going to grad school for STEM and being the only woman in your class. I can handle myself. I’m pretty handy with a taser.”

“You can’t tase aliens, Darcy.” Jimmy pointed out, feeling the argument spiralling away from him.

“Respectfully disagree.” She responded, before softening. She took a deep breath, trying to dispel her annoyance. She’d dealt with a lot of garbage men in her life; Thor was cool and all, but the way he had left Jane in the lurch had definitely not been. Darcy had watched as her mentor had worried, grieved and raged over the dude before finally coming to the realisation that being a superhero girlfriend wasn’t worth it when the power was so imbalanced and more in the hands of the superhero than the girlfriend. Jane deserved someone who was her equal and, although this was more of a work than romantic setting, so did Darcy. “Look. I appreciate what you’re saying. It’s very… sweet. But it’s not gonna work with me. We’re either a team, or we’re not, and if we’re a team, then we face things together. We watch each other’s backs. You wouldn’t tell Monica to not put herself in harm’s way.”

“Monica can blast energy from her hands.” Jimmy pointed out, although he was quickly wilting under the force of her argument. 

“And I have remarkably good aim with a taser and once punched a S.W.O.R.D agent who was a clown. Literally _and_ figuratively.” Darcy pushed her glasses up her nose. There was still a smudge of goop on her hand and she pulled a face at it. “Close enough.”

He tipped his head back and let out a humourless laugh. “Darcy.” He said in a defeated tone.

“Jimmy.” She challenged, raising her eyebrows. There was a reason she’d been voted ‘Most Likely To Run For President’ in senior year – she had an answer for everything and a habit of winning fights. 

He sighed and pushed off his desk to cross over to hers. Darcy eyed him warily as he reached over and pulled her hand free from her crossed arms. Her heart did a dumb skippy thing as he inspected the leftover residue, slightly paralysed from the surprise of how warm his skin was. He flicked a handkerchief free of his jacket pocket – jeez, he could be such a grandpa sometimes – and wiped her hand gently like she was a wild animal that would bolt at the slightest movement. Between this and his magic tricks, she was starting to doubt his claims of clumsy hands.

“I know,” He said slowly, as though he was thinking over every word before he let it leave his mouth. He was watching his cleaning efforts intently as he spoke. “That you can take care of yourself. But, like you said, we’re a team. So, if anything happens to you, it’s on me. And I don’t want me watching your back be literally that, left behind while you run into goodness knows what.”

Darcy swallowed. “You can watch my butt too, if you want.” 

He looked at her sharply.

“Sorry,” She mumbled, cowed by his gaze. She knew he’d seen Monica get absorbed by the Hex not once, but twice, not knowing whether it would be the last time he ever saw her. They hadn’t discussed the Blip, but she didn’t know anyone who hadn’t been affected by their loved ones dusting away. It had been a scary couple of years on ol’ planet Earth and she could appreciate the concern, even if she refused to let it become all-consuming and affect the good dynamic they kinda had going. “I don’t deal well with sincerity.”

Jimmy laughed again, more genuinely this time. “How about this.” He suggested, tucking the handkerchief away. “I don’t underestimate your ability to look after yourself and you don’t underestimate mine.” When she opened her mouth to argue, he cut her off. “If you thought that goo was harmless, you wouldn’t have jumped in the way, especially not with your favourite hat on.”

Darcy had to concede there. “You were worth the sacrifice of Senor Beano.” She offered quietly.

“And I appreciate that.” He shook his head. “But nothing is worth the sacrifice of you.”

She felt a little warm and fuzzy, like that time she’d binge-watched Hallmark Christmas movies with spiked cocoa. “Okay, so… You don’t want me to get hurt and I don’t want you to get hurt. So, we try avoid unnecessary danger and watch each other’s backs.” Darcy counter-proposed, feeling a little mushy. “And maybe butts. I don’t know about you, but it’s been a while so…”

“Deal.” Jimmy froze. “I mean, not the butt thing.”

She laughed at his inability to handle her teasing, making a mental note of the new buttons she had learned she could press. Only when necessary, of course. With great power comes great responsibility, and the power to make Jimmy Woo go bright red was not one to be treated lightly. 

“Deal.” She parroted. “Also, you can let go of my hand now.”

Jimmy dropped her hand as though Mjolnir had administered an electric shock. Darcy smirked. She’d never been that great with responsibility, actually.

“Now, quit slacking, Agent Woo. Don’t you have paperwork on today’s adventuring to do?” She admonished, giving him a gentle shove back towards his desk.

“Oh, I see how it is.” He made his way back behind his desk, sitting down with a fond smile. “You’ve got my back till there’s admin involved?”

“Pretty much. I’m just a consultant, remember. You’re the one trained in the mystical art of FBI incident reports.” She grinned cheekily at him, before turning her back to him so she could reach over her desk. She’d left her rucksack on her chair and the few steps it would take to round the furniture felt like too much effort after such a long day. She wanted to dig out her ID, swipe herself out of this building, get rid of Jimmy’s (admittedly nice smelling) gym gear and sink into a bubble bath hotter than the flames of Ragnorak. 

“By the way, you look good.”

“Huh?” Darcy turned to look over her shoulder, one hand continuing to root through her bag for her lanyard.

Jimmy seemed just as surprised as her that he’d spoken, but shrugged. “My clothes suit you.” He said, clearly without thinking through the implications of his words. At Darcy’s raised eyebrows, he instantly started to go pink, starting with his ears and flushing down his neck. “I mean- the FBI- the, um, the standard issue gym kit, it’s good. You look good, you know…” He floundered, then found an adjective and gave her a double thumbs up. “Sporty!”

Well, fuck a duck, that was endearing as hell. Darcy decided to enjoy watching him squirm for a few more seconds.

“Hey, thanks.” She preened for a moment, before finally grasping her ID badge and yanking it free. She sashayed exaggeratedly to the door, twirling the lanyard as she went. “I _knew_ you wanted to look at my butt.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: the people asked for Thor, they're gonna get Thor...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of stunned by the reaction to Goodbye Until Tomorrow? Thank you everyone!!
> 
> To show my appreciation, here is the requested Thor and Jimmy introduction :)

Being told there was a giant homeless man with a huge axe in the lobby of your new-ish workplace was a lot to deal with after only three sips of coffee. Darcy thought longingly of the steaming, barely-touched cup waiting for her on her desk as she followed the agent out of the elevator.

“I’m sorry, Doctor Lewis.” The agent apologised profusely as she led her through the security Darcy had already passed by on her way into the building ten minutes ago. “He keeps asking for you and well…”

They rounded the corner to the reception, where her mystery guest was caught in heated conversation with the building’s floor staff. She couldn’t see his face, but he towered over everyone around him, straggly blonde hair falling down his back. He was clasping an axe almost as tall as him (and therefore the same height as most of the agents he faced), a gnarled handle which was melded to a brutally sharp looking blade. Everything was clearly going well, what with all the FBI agents pointing their guns at him as he glowered.

“Sir, for the final time, you cannot take your axe-“

“Stormbreaker.” The big dude interrupted, voice grave.

“I’m sorry sir, I can’t allow you to bring a weapon into a federal building-“

“Wait a second.” Darcy stepped forward into the fray, despite her new agent friend’s protests. “Thor?”

The man’s demeanour changed in an instant; as he straightened and turned, the deadly demeanour melted from his eyes and was replaced with an almost obnoxious amount of cheer. He looked a little like a buff Santa as he spread his arms, axe and all, out widely as though he expected a hug. The armed agents adjusted their aims accordingly.

“Darcy!” He crowed. “You see,” he added accusingly to the nearest agent. “I told you I had a friend here.”

“Uhh…” Darcy gaped at him, seriously wishing she’d downed her coffee earlier even though she knew Jimmy would have spent the rest of the day chiding her for burning herself. 

“Well?” Thor beamed at her. 

“Oh my god.” Darcy wasn’t religious, but if Jesus fancied dropping down to Earth and picking up his distant god cousin right now, she would definitely become devout. She’d even go to Jimmy’s youth pastor meetings and help corral all the sticky-fingered communion kids into colouring pictures of Noah’s Ark or whatever it was he did there. 

“Doctor Lewis, how would you like to proceed?” The agent who had brought her downstairs asked.

Accepting Jesus wasn’t going to come help her out, Darcy sighed. “I guess he’s with me?” Warily, the agents surrounding Thor lowered their guns. Darcy wished she could enjoy being drunk on the power of ordering them about, but she’d literally never felt more sober. “But you really do have to give them the axe for lock-up, my dude.”

Thor shot her a wounded look that suggested he was approximately six years old and she’d tried to take a beloved childhood blankie from him. 

After a little more persuading and an oath from the agent in charge of lock-up to keep it safe ‘by the honour of his daughters’, Stormbreaker was relinquished to the FBI for temporary safekeeping. Darcy hustled Thor back through the lobby to the elevator, bundling him in and repeatedly jabbing the button for the fifth floor. She never thought she’d actually want to hear jangly elevator muzak, but as the doors slid closed and the metal box churned through the floors, she wished there was some playing instead of the weird silence that had settled.

She glanced across at Thor to find him smiling blandly at her. She bared her teeth in an awkward attempt of a grin back.

“Heeeeeeeeey buddy.” Darcy punched his arm lightly. “Long time no see.”

Thor looked at her fondly. “I realise you might find this awkward, what with Jane and I mutually agreeing to go our separate ways.”

“What?” Darcy spluttered, definitely not being awkward. “Noooo. _No_. You don’t need to- really, it’s uh, fine.” She’d already had the divorce talk once from her actual parents – she definitely didn’t need to hear it again from an Avenger she hadn’t heard from in around ten years. 

“Because we both care about you very much and you had nothing to do with our mutual decision to mutually no longer be romantically involved.” Thor ploughed on.

“Didn’t, um,” Darcy clicked her tongue, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye. “Didn’t Jane, like… dump you? A while ago now?”

Thor blinked. “Yes. _Mutually_.”

“Okay, good talk.” She muttered under her breath. “No offense or anything but, uh, what are you doing here?”

“I’ve lived a long life, Darcy.” Thor began contemplatively. Ah yes, she’d forgotten his love of monologues. “And in that long life, I’ve met many people. And they’ve lived. And they’ve died. And I’ve continued living. While they have been dead. In the last few years alone, well, many noble warriors have fallen. Which is to say-“

“Thor.” Darcy tentatively put a hand to his arm and patted his ridiculously large bicep comfortingly. When she'd first met Thor, he'd been human but didn't know how to act like it. Over the years, she'd recognised him opening up and becoming more in tune with his emotions, even if his love for all humanity had led to him breaking her mentor's heart. But if he just wanted to see a familiar face now, she couldn't blame him. She’d lived through the snap too; no one needed to relive that trauma right now. “I’ve missed you too, dude.”

There was a tremulous moment where it looked like Thor might burst into tears before he lifted his hand to cover hers. “Thank you… dude.”

The elevator cranked to a halt. Darcy led Thor through the corridors and bullpens, heading towards the tiny little office that was becoming her home away from home. 

“This is me.” She announced, shouldering it open. She wasn’t actually sure if three people would even fit in the room, wincing a little as Thor physically ducked to get through the door. Neither she or Jimmy were hugely blessed in the height department; it had never occurred to her that the doorway wasn’t suitable for those six foot and up. They didn’t get many visitors.

She squeezed in after him, getting into the office just in time to see Jimmy’s jaw drop. He was sat at his desk, coffee cup half way to his mouth as he gaped up at Thor.

“Greetings!” The Asgardian crowed, cheerfully.

Jimmy made a strangled sound. Darcy lunged over to grab the mug from his hand before he dropped it.

“Did I not tell you it was bring your superhero to work day? Silly me.” Darcy leaned up against the desk. Glancing ruefully at her the now-cold coffee on her desk, she took an experimental sip of the one she had just rescued from Jimmy. “Meet Thor. Thor this is my partner, Jimmy.”

Jimmy shot to his feet and bowed. “It is an _honour_.” He said reverently, still bent at the waist. 

“What are you doing?” Darcy hissed out of the corner of her mouth. She’d expected some weird behaviour, but not from him. 

“Partner, eh?” Thor’s eyes twinkled as he glanced over at Darcy. “Congratulations!”

She looked at him blankly. “Thank you?” She reached over the desk and prodded Jimmy in the ribs to make him quit bowing. He straightened, rubbing his side and glaring at her a little. “Do the card thing.” She prompted. “He’ll love it.”

“What? No!” Jimmy protested, keeping his voice low. “I’m not doing the card thing in front of a _literal god_.”

“No, seriously, he’ll get a kick out of it-“

“-he’s seen proper magic -“

“-I’m telling you, it’ll be great-“

“-the man can fly, he doesn’t care about-“

“-just do the thing!” Darcy insisted, glaring at him over the rim of her stolen coffee cup.

Thor chuckled. “I see why you are partners. You two argue like true lovers.”

Darcy had just made the terrible decision to take another sip and promptly spat coffee out across the carpet before beginning to choke. Jimmy’s mouth hit the floor for the second time in as many minutes. 

“I’m okay!” Darcy wheezed as Thor took a concerned step towards her. She held up a hand and waved him back, still spluttering. Knowing her luck, a well-meaning smack on the back from him would send her through a wall. “I’m okay, I’m just- I mean, _we’re_ not…” She cleared her throat uncomfortably. “…like that.”

Thor’s brow crinkled. “You said you were partners.”

“ _Work_ partners.” She clarified, thumping her own chest. “We work together.”

“Did you not work with... oh, whatshisname? Ian, in London?” He questioned. 

“We don’t need to talk about him right now. Or ever.” Darcy pleaded. She’d been sure that she could do long distance over a couple of continents, especially if Jane and Thor could make it work despite most of the universe in their way. Shocking absolutely nobody except her naive self, she'd been wrong on both counts and she'd sworn to not let romance come into her work again. Well, she liked to say that, but it didn't help that half the world's eligible bachelors had soon dusted away and the ones left on her astrophysics programme were mostly mansplainers.

Clarity seemed to be descending slowly for Thor. “So, you’re not… romantically entwined?”

Darcy had never met Doctor Strange, but she wished he would suddenly make an appearance to open one of his glowing portals beneath her and get her out of this conversation. She’d genuinely missed Thor – even if she was still a bit mad at him on behalf of Jane – but she’d forgotten how embarrassing he could be. She wasn’t entirely convinced he was actually confused; he’d always been in touch with his romantic side what with the Shakespearean monologuing (although that seemed to have fallen by the wayside over the years) and fashion choices that revolved around dramatic capes. He did have a sense for these things. Not that there was a thing here to sense.

“We’re not.” She confirmed at the same time as Jimmy said, “We can’t.”

Two sets of eyes zeroed in on him. Darcy was glad she hadn’t taken another swig of coffee; she wasn’t sure the carpet could take another dousing after she spat it out again. 

“Um.” Jimmy withered slightly under their stares, Darcy’s mildly panicked and Thor’s pleased as punch. “What I mean to say is, we’re not and also we couldn’t if we wanted to. Which we don’t. There’s a policy against co-workers. Well, not a policy. It’s more of a strict suggestion against… entwining. Romantically.”

An awkward silence settled heavily around the office. Darcy was still rooting for the good doctor to rock up and use his magic sparkle hands to send her to literally anywhere else. The Sahara Desert was probably nice this time of year, right? Jimmy seemed like his head was about to explode; Thor was looking at her with gooey eyes. She really regretted teaching him what shipping was last time he’d been hanging around with them on Earth and they’d been bored waiting for Jane and Erik to wrap up a complex experiment. Showing Thor the internet in general had been a bad idea that had given her a headache – ‘you have this puny level of connectivity and you limit yourself further to two hundred and forty letters?’ – but the pop culture aspect had been a real mistake.

“Well.” She eventually broached. “Thank you for updating us all on that office protocol, Jimmy.”

He scowled at her, but at least the tension broke a little. “Can I have my coffee back?”

“Nope.” Darcy pushed off his desk, keeping the mug out of his reach as she took another slurp. It didn’t have enough sugar, but it was still hot and that was good enough for her. “Now do the card trick.”

Jimmy rolled his eyes but dutifully produced his business card with a flick of his wrist, clearly unwilling to restart their argument and be accused of dating again. It was kind of cute how he always had cards prepared to do it. 

Thor’s eyes bulged. “You are blessed by witches!” He announced, swiping the business card from Jimmy’s hand and inspecting it thoroughly. “What is the source of your power?”

Jimmy glanced over at Darcy, who was hiding her smirk in his stolen coffee cup. He looked completely bewildered. “Uh… the Online Close-Up Magic University?”

“There is a school for witches on Midgard?” Thor held the card up to one of his eyes, then the other, squinting at it.

“What is happening right now?” Jimmy asked out of the corner of his mouth, awed by Thor’s reaction.

“Told you he’d dig it.” Darcy muttered back. “Online Close-Up Magic University?”

“You weren’t the only one getting an education during the Snap.” He said defensively. 

“Oh, my bad, Doctor Woo, Sorcerer Supreme-ly Annoying.”

Thor cleared his throat pointedly. Darcy wasn’t sure how she managed to forget he was stood there when he took up most of the room. He was giving her a knowing look, which was kind of irritating coming from a dude flummoxed by a business card a moment ago. How did he make his eyes go all twinkly and wise – was it a lightning god thing or an overly invested in this non-situation thing? 

“So, how’s space?” She asked quickly, desperate to say something before he could.

“Space is good. I’ve been on a roadtrip with some friends. But in space, so a spacetrip. One of them is a talking rabbit.” He shrugged nonchalantly. Darcy chose not to chase that comment further, even though she could see Jimmy looked like he had a million questions on the tip of his tongue. “We’re like, guarding the galaxy and stuff now, so you’re welcome.”

“Thank you.” Jimmy said, earnestly. Darcy finished his coffee and handed the empty mug back to him. Without taking his eyes off Thor, he automatically went to take a sip, blinking in confusion when there was nothing left.

“My new friends have been on many great adventures.” Thor continued, basking in Jimmy’s awe. “Just yesterday Peter Quill was telling me of the time he took down a dreaded gang of cobras in organised combat, despite one of them gravely injuring his leg.”

Darcy frowned. “Isn’t that the ending of The Karate Kid?”

“Hmm?”

“Never mind. Glad you’re having a good time, bud.” She genuinely meant it, smiling warmly. “It’s important to have people to looking out for you.”

She chanced a quick glance at Jimmy, averting her eyes when she caught sight of his expression softening at her words. She hadn't specifically been referring to him. Well, okay, she had. But he didn't need to know that. 

“So…” She elongated the word awkwardly, racking her (extremely brilliant) mind as she felt the room get warm. Or maybe it was just her. “Coffee?” She squawked.

“I’ll get it.” Jimmy volunteered, squeezing around his desk. “Since I seem to be in need of a refill.” He added pointedly as he brushed past Darcy.

She did a spot-on Wanda Maximoff impression in response, sticking her tongue out at his back.

“Ah! Coffee!” Thor cheered. “I shall accompany you to the source of the delicious beverage.”

Jimmy looked like it was Christmas Day and his birthday all rolled into one. “Really?”

“Of course! We shall take on this quest to provide sustenance for the fair maiden.” Thor winked at Darcy.

“My brave knights.” She quipped in return, waving them off with her best regal wave (thank you Princess Diaries). She leaned in the doorway of the office, watching them walk back towards the elevator, Thor’s huge frame hulking over Jimmy’s shorter one as they spoke. 

She had a feeling they weren’t going to get much work done today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me how much you love Thor and who/what else you want to see :)


End file.
